As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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