just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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