why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
