Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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