Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
