i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
