found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
My breath smells like gin and sadness
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize