you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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