Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
cat food counts as protein by the way
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
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