Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Randomize
