fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize
