you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
