hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
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I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
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I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
I woke up under a house in Key West
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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