Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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