To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
