Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
