What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
