you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
