Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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