I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
