But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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