im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I'm bleeding and have questions
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