this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
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