He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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