id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
you win again, gameday.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Randomize