God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
