you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize