so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
