There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
