and i looked up. we had an audience...
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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