I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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