I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
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My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
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Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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