Already got asked if we're dating
Umm I'm too high to move.
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize