Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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