So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
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