hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Randomize