Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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