Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
