waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
Randomize