just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize
