I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize