Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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