I wish i was in the wii world.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
