You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I looked at my own cervix.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
