My hand turned me down
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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