When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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