i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?