Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Do you remember me asking for jerk off videos from Tinder guy?
Nah I don't remember that being part of the criteria
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
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