that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
