Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
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