if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
We had sex on a dog bed..
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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