Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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